Dustin J. Craig’s Blog

Immoral Mortals

Tue, 5 Jan 2010 12:48:49 -0700

Pay no mind to these gentlemen.
Their bones, their blood, their carnal skin,
Their immoral deeds are graphic.

Don't bend to men to lend a hand,
Their compared shared genuine sin
Through mud, filth, and human traffic.

How they display their disarray
To what extent their torment lament
To Efface ink with rubber smudge

As they pray and joyfully say,
It's against god's will and judgement.
When they themselves are being judged.

- Dustin J. Craig

Superficial Facebook. (Part 2)

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 15:00:07 -0700

I believe that society has become so detached from the real world, that they’ve forgotten what it means to be a real friend. By the way, it takes two people to have a conversation.

I live next to a busy road and I watch the cars go by every day. They all hurry off to go shopping, to their jobs, to their kids’ soccer practices, picking up their kids, dropping their kids off, hurrying home, etc., never stopping to see me dancing naked in my window (I’m joking, of course.) I’ve been dying to meet one of my neighbors, but every time I go out the door, they’re always goin in! Nobody has time for each other anymore! Nobody wants to take the time out of their day to get to know one another!

For example, here’s a conversation that could happen between two friends in real life:

Fred: Hey, Tom! How are ya?
Tom: I’m doin fine, but you’ll never believe what happened to me today as I was driving over here.
Fred: What happened?
Tom: This car ran a red light and smashed into my car!
Fred: That sucks! Are you OK?
Tom: I’m fine, but my car is totaled. You wouldn’t by any chance know a good lawyer and a repair shop, would you?
Fred: Hey, a buddy of mine is a lawyer. His son is a mechanic and also works at a bar down the street. Wanna grab a few beers?
Tom: I’d love to! Let’s go.

Now, here’s that same conversation if it were on Facebook:

Fred Somebody just got into an accident. I’m fine, but my car is totaled. Anybody know a good lawyer and mechanic?
Tom Everybody Sucks, dude! Glad you’re OK
Carrie Farnsworth sorry that was me
Alice Lostman LOL!!!
Matt Roker lololololol!!!!!!!!!1!

Pop quiz: Did you even read the comment writers’ names? Probably not. Did I just blow your mind? Probably, yes.

Sure, facebook is great finding old friends, maybe explaining certain circumstances that you find hilarious. Don’t use it as your main source of communication. Facebook is like a cesspool of everybody saying everything, but nobody is saying anything.

I’m not saying humanity is doomed. I actually found a glimmer of hope this weekend. As I was walking our dog Mesmo, a dad took the time away from everything to play catch with his son on the front lawn of their home. You just don’t see that anymore these days. Was that a front to show how great of a dad he is? Probably. That small occurrence, however, is deeper than anything that has ever been said on Facebook.

Superficial Facebook.

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 17:51:18 -0700

I’m tired of micro-blogging. Yes, there’s the convenience, but where’s the heart?

I’m coming back to my blog. I liked my personal touch, even if the design is generated by iWeb. Here, I’m able to post all my art, my pictures, my stories. On my site, it’s just me. No “Friend” button. No “Like” button. In fact, I’ll add my own friend and enemy buttons, my own like and dislike buttons. Here, if something needs done, I can do it. All my thoughts aren’t broadcasted to the whole world, just to the few who ever visit this tiny little blog.

So, I got something lately. My view of the world has always been “If I care about you, then you will care about me.” Not true at all. The very few true friends that I’ve cared deeply about I can count on two hands. Half of them have treated me like crap in some form or another. All my life, people around me have acted like they knew a joke, but refused to tell me. I think I get it now. “You don’t care about me, so I shouldn’t care about you.”

I have always offered my shoulder to good friends to cry on when they need it the most. I’ve always tried to show sympathy, compassion, and emotional support to everyone around me. When it comes to my needs, my emotions, and when I’m crying, the only person there for me has always been Glen. I’m so glad I have him in my life.

I wish more of my friends would offer emotional support to me too, though. Every day, I am racked with suicidal thoughts, depression, and anger I can’t control. Glen’s off to work and I’m stuck at home, alone, with a gun, plenty of pills and nobody to talk me out of it. I want these thoughts out of my head.

My problem is that I care too much. I sit and listen to people’s problems, their stories, their lives, what they have to say, what they’re going through, and I shut up and let them talk. When it’s my turn to tell my story, my problems, my life, what I have to say and what I’m going through, suddenly nobody’s there, or they are aggressive or judgmental. No friends, no emotional support, and no shoulder to cry on, and it becomes such a vicious cycle when I try to explain my problem of trying to put everyone else’s problems on me.

Epic Do-Over.

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 13:30:48 -0600

All my old entries seemed to have messed up dates, and I’m not too proud of some of the entries I’ve wrote. I’m gonna rehash and collaborate them all into a few paragraphs to get y’all caught up:

I was born and raised into the Mormon religion. They’re all hypocrites, and treat each other like shit. It’s just a tax exempt international multi-billion dollar corporation posing as the kingdom of God on earth, swindling 10% of all their brainwashed followers’ money for their continued membership or be cast into the fiery pits of hell forever and ever, if they don’t. I hate my mom, she abused all her children, physically, mentally, emotionally, verbally, socially, spiritually, and even sexually. She’s a lying, manipulative, child abusing bitch. My mom tricked me into coming out to her. I was sheltered. Despite my libido, I didn’t know what sex/sexuality/homosexuality was until I was in college. I was abused in a daycare when I was 4, I only had one friend in the whole world while growing up, I had one friend in middle school and in high school, but bless his heart, he committed suicide. I hated elementary school, middle school, high school and college.

I’m a porn addict, I tried quitting, didn’t work. Glen doesn’t care, I don’t care, I’ve given in, I love porn. I’ve converted all my porn to iPod and iPhone format. I met my Glen about on my birthday when I turned 19. As of this writing, we’ve been together for 8 years! We lived with his mom for a while, we had two cats, named Dot and Matrix, Dot ran away, we gave Matrix to our good friends Devon and Dre. We now have a dog named Mesmo. We now live in a big, new, fancy townhouse, just the three of us! Glen takes really good care of me, he has given me everything I could ever want! I love Macs, iPods, iPhones, and anything that has to do with Apple Computers. My first Mac was a Performa 6320, then a G4 Cube, iMac G5, Macbook, and now a MacBook Pro. I was thrilled when an Apple Store moved in just a few blocks from our old house while we were still living there. I’ve been a devoted Mac fan for over a decade, and I’ve never had my systems infected by a virus. I got a bunch of iPods, and an iPhone 3G

I have impassioned views of the world, society, politics, and religion that sometimes clouds my judgement and thinking. I’m self-centered, and egotistical, and I like to think I have more talent than I really do. I hate kids. I’ve gained way too many enemies in this fucked up world. I’ve been threatened with lawsuits by friends and even family. A lot of people don’t like me, and I don’t like a lot of people. I get depressed a lot. I deal with extreme suicidal thoughts every day. I’ve gotten ugly and fat. I never got a driver’s license, no thanks to my mom for scaring me away from ever learning how to drive. I’ve been fired for being better at my job than my boss’ wife. I’m not a fan of movie theaters, and there are very few movies I like. I’m a diehard Gargoyles fan. I’m an artist, and I love drawing stuff. I enjoy Yoga, and I like to sing, dance and get naked when nobody’s around. I can do a few tricks with contact juggling. I like to play console and computer games. I’ve got a level 74 Human Paladin on World of Warcraft on Proudmoore named Pailisto. I had some issues with a certain gay guild in WoW. I got a Playstation 2 and 3, Wii, and my favorite computer games are Sims, Spore and Second Life. I owned three clubs in Second Life, all of them were devoted to gay sex. I like to travel, but I hate flying. We have a timeshare in Park City, we like to go to Las Vegas, and we enjoyed our trip to Hawaii. Someday, I want to go to Australia.

Y’all caught up?